to be honest, i was lying

by thanks for coming

supported by
robin (compsigh)
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robin (compsigh) writing is so good singing is so good holy heck Favorite track: niagara falls.
Cameron
Cameron thumbnail
Cameron THIS IS ACTUALLY THE BEST OMG. One of my favorite albums of 2020. Favorite track: directions.
iimber
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iimber another album for me to space out to <3 thank you rachel Favorite track: i can get emotional too.
paolo latini
paolo latini  thumbnail
paolo latini I don’t know what exactly “bedroom pop” is supposed to be, but it seems to me to be clear that that of Rachel Brown/thanks for coming is the best bedroom pop out there right now. Favorite track: 200 million steps.
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    "I DON'T WANT YOU IN MY BEDROOM
    I JUST WANT TO KNOW YOU'D WANT TO
    I DON'T CARE HOW COLD THAT MAKES ME
    MY LANDLORD JOHN PAYS FOR THE HEAT
    AND YOU DIDN'T OFFER DID YOU BABY"

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1.
warmer 02:38
i don't want you in my bedroom i just want to know you'd want to i don't care how cold that makes me my landlord john pays for the heat and you didn't offer did you baby there you are for three straight days is it a sign that i'm deranged for wondering if it's something that i should keep my eyes on cuz you might have a head shot shoot me once or shoot me twice the hundredth time i'll still play nice cuz i'm not even that invested i'm just here to play out my death wish a broken heart with its defects i want to be on your mind and in your space crossing the line and blurring all our body parts until i don't know who i was i must've been on my way out i don't want you in my bedroom i just want to know you'd want to i don't care how cold that makes me my landlord john pays for the heat and you didn't offer did you baby you didn’t offer to make me warmer
2.
directions 03:57
i know you’ve got your friends in the backseat of your car and i’ve heard all the stories from when you pushed the pedal way too far thought you’d still pick me up and show me what you were made of back when you drove for months just to drive all the way back to park how come it’s never me? and yet i’m still waiting i’m calling to tell you i would’ve read the map for miles so you could get us there i’m calling to tell you i’m on the subway and i’m no longer coming it’s not like you would care you paint your pictures of road side stops and empty streets oh what i would give to sit in the passenger seat thought you’d still pick me up cuz i decided to believe in us but when push came to shove you left me alone on the concrete how come it hurts so bad? there’s nowhere to arrive at i’m calling to tell you i would’ve read the map for miles so you could get us there i’m calling to tell you i’m on the subway and i’m no longer coming it’s not like you would care i’m calling to tell you you’re out of gas and you’re close to stalling i’m calling to tell you i’m having nightmares but you’re probably alright i’m calling to tell you i hope that you just get where you’re going and you find yourself somewhere
3.
of all the things that i would like to someday tell you, it’s too heavy, my arms are full of holding someone else’s hands to think that all i’ve found here down here in the hole that i have dug is the absence of colors and their counterparts the only thought that i can think inside the darkness is how i miss you but not enough to climb back up to the edge and lose everything i lost while i was dreaming once again so the years go by and you remain in a town i’ve never seen i’m still in the same place with no footing or foundation i can fall to when i falter oh how some things never change kept the ice around for bruises but it’s melting up somewhere out in the sun where i can’t remember and i can’t ignore all the things that i have lost while i was dreaming
4.
sometimes i’m a girl and sometimes i’m the oldest man in the world on the loneliest train car in the busiest city wishing that someone might think that i’m pretty sometimes i’m the boss and sometimes i’m all curled up in your palm you string me along, a loose thread of a seam, i’m still hoping that you might say what you mean like “i didn’t think that, you could get mad no i didn’t think that you could get mad no i didn’t think that you could get mad” but i can and i am and i can and i am and i can and i am and i can i break my neck so you can heal it to feel important so make it make sense i make the bed so you can get in i break my neck how could you forget sometimes i’m on time but most of my life i’ve been running behind now it seems like i’ll never catch up but the world spins too fast when it’s all said and done sometimes i’m your friend and sometimes i hope to never see you again in the busiest city on the loneliest evening, i miss you so much i can hardly believe it oh you didn’t think that i could get sad no you didn’t think that i could get sad no you didn’t think that i could get sad but i can and i am and i can and i am and i can and i am and i can no i didn’t think that you could make me mad no i didn’t think that you could make me sad no i didn’t think that you could get me back but you did and i give what i’ve got but it’s not what i want so i stop and we drop off i break my neck so you can heal it to feel important so make it make sense i make the bed so you can get in i break my neck how could you forget how could i forgive
5.
all i want to know is if the writing on the wall is written in a tongue that i could swallow would reading it make me feel awful try to tie the knot too tight and look into a blinding light to see everything i've been missing while zoning out in my man made prison you saw the way i dropped the ball into pieces into pieces into pieces into pieces you caught me on my one day off i don't believe it don't believe don't believe it don't believe it there is then and there is never a ghost who's heard of buried treasure at least they've got a destination but it's been turned into gas station "so smile when you get the chance" they tell me as their faces can't but there is nothing else like effort so here i am on their endeavor you saw the way i dropped the ball into pieces into pieces into pieces into pieces you caught me on my one day off i don't believe it don't believe don't believe it don't believe it into pieces i don’t believe it
6.
i don’t wanna be your coffin i just wanna see Niagara Falls there’s nails in the walls nails in the walls word on the street is you’ve been walkin’ i don’t wanna be your coffin you’d look good in Tennessee stare straight at me stare straight at me word on the street is total silence wanna get sentimental, saccharine, and detrimental? oh yeah i can get nostalgic, oh yeah baby i can get sick i don’t wanna be your coffin or on a train through Battle Creek your voice makes me weak you make me weak word on the street is you’ve been talkin’ i don’t wanna be your coffin just want a place on Sunset Strip can you take me with can you take me with word on the street is the weather’s boring wanna get sentimental, saccharine, and detrimental? oh yeah i can get nostalgic, oh yeah baby i can get sick oh yeah i can get nostalgic, oh yeah it’s almost too quick i don’t want to be your coffin i just want to be your best friend i don’t want to be your coffin i just want to be your best friend
7.
it’s a holiday, could i learn to celebrate? oh to embrace a fall from grace, i’ll miss you most when it’s mine to make so scared to feel my rage, i keep it close to my rib cage it’s mine to face and to retain, but i miss you more every passing day i know, it’s life to death, that’s the way it goes i know, i’m the one who left just to find it so i know, a location could never be a home i know, a relation lasts longer than bones changing a residence, the reflection of my footprints call it an inheritance, i miss i miss i miss i miss i know, a location could never be a home i know, a relation lasts longer than bones i know, it’s life to death, that’s the way it goes i know, i’m the one who left just to find it so
8.
stagnant 02:26
you’ve been contacted by the very people you despise so what are you gonna say to them? it’s quiet stagnant quiet you're talking too loud they gave everyone i’ve ever known a life boat with no place to go no place to go what is it that you’re gonna say what will you tell them to their face good riddance you’re an imperialist, your entire empire is full of hypocrites
9.
i had a dream last night i had a dream last night i had a dream last night where we were together i had a dream last night i had a dream last night i had a dream last night you took photos of the architecture i tried to get back there but i sat down instead with everything that makes me scared to converse about the spider web and the intricate findings of the fear in my eye and how my skin is unwinding and that there’s more here than life i had a dream last night where things were getting better i had a dream last night there was something special about the architecture and the intimate findings of the fear in my eye and how my skin is unwinding and that there’s more here than life so i must have been thinking about the way that you move and the silence between us, affecting the way i do too so i must have been thinking about the way that you move and the silence between us, affecting the way i do too i had a dream last night i had a dream last night i had a dream last night and woke up inside of architecture

about

credits

released November 27, 2020

songs by rachel brown

production by nate amos

guitar and vocals by rachel
all other instruments by nate

photographs by julie orlick
artwork by rachel

thanks to my family, mike, charlie, all my friends, and beauty fool records

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thanks for coming Brooklyn, New York

thanks! (they/them)

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