therapy session

by thanks for coming

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04:31
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this is when i started being sad

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released February 24, 2013

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thanks for coming New York, New York

mostly sad and stupid and always in my bedroom

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Track Name: skeleton
i've got holes in every pair of shoes i own
i know less now than i've ever known
i'm not praying but oh god i'm all alone
i'm a skeleton but i've lost all my bones

and i i'm not worthless but i'm worth less than i
want not self-conscious but i'm conscious that i'm
not what i want to be who i want to be
and i i am fixing that i'm fixing me

i have a nervous system that always breaks down
i'm worried i'm the only one left around
i'm the rightful owner of a paper crown
i want to be the stars but i'm lying on the ground

and i i'm not worthless but i'm worth less than i
want not self-conscious but i'm conscious that i'm
not what i want to be who i want to be
and i i am fixing that i'm fixing me
Track Name: don't tell me that you love me
i don't want you to tell me you love me, no
i want you to say, i'm in your veins, i take up every space in your body
i'm in your head, i'm in your lungs, i'm the bullet in your heart from the gun
i'm the alcohol, thinning your blood, i'm the bruises on your sides that make you look tough

i don't want you to tell me you love me, if it's not true
am i what you say, am i in your veins, do i take up every space in your body
am i in your head, am i in your lungs, am i the bullet in your heart from the gun
am i the alcohol, thinning your blood, am i the bruises on your sides that make you look tough

i don't want you to tell me you love me, i know it's not true
cuz i'm the bitter cold, i'm the snow storm, i'm the broken radiator that used to keep you warm
i'm broken bottles, i'm shattered glass, i'm the cuts in your skin from all the cracks
i'm the crashing car, i'm the accident, i'm the 10 o'clock news auto wreck

i would want you to tell me you love me if you did
i would want you to say, i'm in your veins, i take up every space in your body
i'm in your head, i'm in your lungs, i'm the bullet in your heart from the gun
i'm the alcohol, thinning your blood, i'm the bruises on your sides that make you look tough

i want you to love me
Track Name: hungover
i'm not drunk enough to say i love myself, but i'm not sober enough to try
you think i'm beautiful through your beer goggles, and i wish you were right
i don't want to be right cuz that means that i'm worthless and only living to die
at least your slurs sound enough like words, and yeah i guess i'm doing fine

turn off the lights close the shades i'm not waking up
i'm 100% sober and 100% fucked up
my blankets protect me more than my skin ever did
i'm sleeping in and i'm turning off, awake isn't worth it

i'm standing all alone in somebody's home, i met once or twice or so
you ask for a lighter and i've never been higher, yet i still feel so damn low
i feel like a tourist and my friends are the city, who i no longer know
i want to meet someone new go someplace i've only been through, this night's for room to grow

turn off the lights close the shades i'm not waking up
i'm 100% sober and 100% fucked up
my blankets protect me more than my skin ever did
i'm sleeping in and i'm turning off, awake isn't worth it
Track Name: i'm sorry
you are just somebody i can blame when i am tired
i'm not tired but i'll blame you anyways
you are just the barrier between the mirror and my fist
you scream that it hurts and i yell goddamn i missed
i'm not a poem i'm just a pile of crooked bones
i've learned to be lonely you don't need to be alone
you are just somebody i can blame when i am tired
and yeah i'm tired but that doesn't make it right

these words are the bruises on my rib cage
when i forget to breathe
and this is the point in my life when i realize
i'm just one big apology

this is just something i can hurt when i am angry
i'm not angry but i'll hurt it anyways
there's comfort under covers where the world can't reach
and in scratches on my wrist that i've made purposely
you say self hatred can be cured but i'm just not trying
i take showers hoping they'll drown out the crying
this is just something i can hurt when i am angry
and yeah i'm angry but that doesn't make it okay

these words are the bruises on my rib cage
when i forget to breathe
and this is the point in my life when i realize
i'm just one big apology
Track Name: backyard swimming pool
i'm so tired of making monsters out of shadows and shadows out of wrong directions
i refuse to miss out on my mistakes from my miscalculated sentences
i'm learning that my bones aren't castle walls, i'm just a cabinet for something breakable
i always thought that my cold heart made me stronger but hearts made out of ice are much more fragile

and i'm falling apart, falling asleep, falling into a pool
in someone's backyard, we're just kids, i'm happy for once

i cannot fit all my screams into the alphabet, 26 letters still can't spell pain
i'm far too empty for any other organs to leave, i'm locking up my rib cage
i cannot sleep because there's someone yelling that i'm perfect for something wrong
i'm shoving oxygen down my throat and all my clothes into drawers, because that's where they belong

and i'm falling apart, falling asleep, falling into a pool
in someone's backyard, we're just kids, i'm happy for once
and i'm falling apart, falling asleep, falling into a pool
in someone's backyard, we're just kids, we were so young
and i'm falling apart, falling asleep, falling into a pool
in someone's backyard, we're just kids, i'm happy for once
and i'm falling apart, falling asleep, falling into a pool
in someone's backyard, we're just kids, we were so young