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about

credits

released August 19, 2016

guitar/vocals: rachel brown
bass: lindsey sherman
drums: nate amos

recorded, mixed, and mastered by nate amos of grandpa bay recordings

cover art by rachel brown

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license

all rights reserved

about

thanks for coming New York, New York

mostly sad and stupid and always in my bedroom

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Track Name: loser
everything that is lost
will turn to dirt
that we walk
until we hit the earth
shaky knees clenched fists
i’ll miss you with my dying breath
shaky knees clenched fists
i’ll miss you and your cigarettes

i am losing you
your body becomes the dirt
where the lilacs will bloom
i didn’t think this would hurt

shaky knees clenched fists
i’ll miss you with my dying breath
shaky knees clenched fists
i’ll miss you and your cigarettes
Track Name: good person
am i a good person?
am i good at being a thing?
am i a good person?
am i good at existing?
am i a good person?
am i good at being?
i’m not a good person
i’m always fleeting

my permanent tattoos are already temporary
the space time continuum is a prison for my body
i believe in chaos more than i believe in anything
and change is inevitable but that’s what makes it scary

am i a good person?
am i good at being a thing?
am i a good person?
am i good at existing?
am i a good person?
am i good at being?
i’m not a good person
i’m always fleeting

i’ve made my decisions and maybe they’re wrong
i’ve watched stars die without even knowing they’re gone
the birds are always singing the same fucking songs
and i hear all the trees whisper rumors to the lawn

am i a good person?
am i good at being a thing?
am i a good person?
am i good at existing?
am i a good person?
am i good at being?
i’m not a good person
i’m always fleeting
Track Name: we r all aliens
i heard you were looking for a sign
that you’ve got some purpose in life
you walked for miles until you wound up in space
you saw a light and thought “this is the place”

what did you hear when you knocked on their door?
“i am not your god i am not your devil i am just here like i was before
you ever existed and betrayed your planet
i am not your god or your devil or anything you can comprehend”

so you went back to earth and bought a house
and yelled at kids who ran their mouths
you stayed silent until they came
you saw a light and thought “this is the day”

what did you say when they knocked on your door?
“i am not your god i am not your devil i am just here like i was before
we ever existed and tried to save the planet
i am not your god or your devil or anything you can comprehend”
Track Name: do u ever feel like a penny
i still can’t find the words to say
as you blow your smoke into my brain
and i think it’s all a little strange
i lose everything except loose change

you’re a mischief maker, just another heartbreaker
you’re a penny saver, i’m as useless as a cent
you’re the toll taker, i’ll be your salt shaker
you’re a piece of paper, and i’m the words that never come

you’re see you later, i’m just a party favor
you’re a penny saver, i’m as useless as a cent
you’re a game player, i’ll be your fee waiver
you’re a piece of paper, and i’m the words that never come

do you ever feel as useless as a penny
do you ever feel as useless as a cent
do you ever feel as useless as a penny
when he says that all of his money has been spent
Track Name: u r not sick, yr electric
i’d give anything to go back to october
i’d tell myself to run out of the hospital
you are not sick, you’re electric, you can’t stay here
he is running out of bottles to drown himself in

i’d give anything to go right to november
i’d run out of this deathly place into his arms
you are not sick, you’re electric, you can’t stay here
he is running out of tops to spin

i’d give anything to be in another body
one that i can trust and won’t bleed
you are not sick, you’re electric, you’re a liar
running out of pills to make you happy

i’d give anything to be on another planet
one that i can actually breathe in the air
you are not sick, you’re electric, you’re a liar
running out of pills to make you happy
Track Name: regarding my ultimate demise
an earthquake one told me I wouldn't live forever
So I wrote back a strongly worded letter
I shout into the night it's your turn to apologize
And it shouts back its not your right to survive

If I were plastic I'd melt under the sun
If I were metal I'd go back to the heat where I was from
If I were glass id break
And if I were religious I would pray

If I were dirt I am dirt I am filth I am earth
If I were sin I am sin but I'm not sorry I'm just human
If I were anything at all
I would probably just dissolve
Track Name: i h8 florida
i know you’ve got your secrets still
you keep them in the potted plant by the windowsill
i steal them but only sometimes
so i can stop the things that make you cry

where will we go when this is over?
where will we go when we get older?
where will we go when it gets colder?
i don’t want to go back to florida

i know that i’ve got my problems still
i keep them hidden with the memories that i’ve killed
i watch them like movies in the nighttime
so i can remember what it’s like to say goodbye

where will we go when this is over?
where will we go when we get older?
where will we go when it gets colder?
i don’t want to go back to florida
Track Name: i buried all of my trash at the river
i left my shovel in the dirt by the river
i left my conscious in the hole that i dug
i left the dirt where i found it by the river
i left the river and i walked home

everything i’ve ever owned is by the river
everything i’ve ever owned is really trash
everything i’ve ever owned is by the river
i don’t think i’ve got the spine to take it back

everything i’ve ever owned is buried
everything i’ve ever owned is gone
everything i’ve ever owned is buried
i’ll be somewhere else before too long

i left my shovel in the dirt by the river
i left my conscious in the hole that i dug
i left the dirt where i found it by the river
i left the river and i walked home
Track Name: i will never be a machine
i am spinning in cycles
first i’m blue and then i’m red
trying to hide my smile
i’m bluffing this hand next hand your
hands are blocking the sidewalk
while your feet are walking on the sun
and i will never be as tall
as i should have been as i really want

i am walking in a straight line
i don’t fall like i did last year
i am yours and you are a land mine
i’m closing green eyes blue eyes your
eyes are watching the blank screen
while your ears are listening to the stars
and i will never be a machine
as i might have been without a heart
Track Name: authorized personnel
I've been listening to your songs
My moms been buying different brands since I've been gone
I've stopped trying to be dead
i’ve been sleeping until I die instead

Do I seem different since I got back
Do I seem happy to say I'm sad
Do you think You could still love me
Even though I left my books in New York City

I'm in the basement walking down hallways that go nowhere
I'm all alone except for the mice and all the janitors
They say don't come this way you can't come this way turn around
You are not authorized personnel

I'm in the basement walking down hallways that go nowhere
I'm all alone except for the mice and all the janitors
They say don't come this way you can't come this way turn around
You are not authorized personnel

You are not authorized personnel
You are not authorized personnel
Track Name: our universe is a simulation
i’ll believe you when you tell me we’re just a simulation
binary code of some past civilization
but your computer parts found my computer heart
i won’t believe you when you tell me we’re not real

i’ll believe you when you tell me this is all a mistake
an inevitable result of gravity and space
but when we sleep i know it’s where i’m supposed to be
i won’t believe you when you tell me we’re not real
Track Name: end of time
do you feel the universe colliding?
you look out the window when i’m driving

tell me how you feel (how you feel) when it feels too real (too real)
i feel kinda scared (kinda scared) hold me until we get there
tell me how you feel (how you feel) when it feels too real (too real)
i feel kinda scared (kinda scared) hold me until we get there

do you feel the continent sliding?
you look past the cracks where i’m hiding

tell me how you feel (how you feel) when it feels too real (too real)
i feel kinda scared (kinda scared) hold me until we get there
tell me how you feel (how you feel) when it feels too real (too real)
i feel kinda scared (kinda scared) hold me until we get there
tell me how you feel (how you feel) when it feels too real (too real)
i feel kinda scared (kinda scared) hold me until we get there