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acoustic fuckery

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released January 5, 2015

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about

thanks for coming New York, New York

mostly sad and stupid and always in my bedroom

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Track Name: drowning in salt
i say that i’m dying, it’s what i want
i’m done crying i will not drown in salt
in this bedroom where my limbs have grown
too heavy to lift up when i need them

i say that i’m leaving, but i’m scared to go
i want to believe in everybody that i know
or used to know back when we played in dirt
before i realized that was all i was ever worth

i believe that god doesn’t believe in me
you scream that you deserve an apology
i believe that god doesn’t believe in me
i whisper that i’m so fucking sorry
i believe that god doesn’t believe in me
you scream you could have been somebody
i believe that god doesn’t believe in me
you ask me why the hell am i drowning

i say that i’m dead, and i mean it now
can you see the light six feet under ground
like they say in the movies and in your favorite book
i wanted to be better but i wasn’t even good
Track Name: literary reference
i know that none of this really matters
i’ll play alice, you’ll play the mad hatter
you look at me from across the train car
i’m falling down rabbit holes in the dark

i know that none of this really matters
i’ll play alice, you’ll play the mad hatter
i look at you from across the train car
you dig holes for me to fall into in the park

i’ll play the queen, you’ll play the flamingoes
i’ll be alone forever ‘cause that’s just how it goes
i think i forgot how to play my cards
cheshire cat don’t rip me apart

i know that none of this really matters
i’ll play alice, you’ll play the mad hater
you look at me from across the train car
i’m falling down rabbit holes in the dark
Track Name: eve
i am starting to admit
i’m weaker than the rest
i’m weaker than the rest

eve don’t hesitate
eve don’t trust the snake
eve i’ve made the same mistakes

i’m punching holes through walls
don’t call me beautiful
i want to be something more

eve don’t hesitate
eve don’t trust the snake
you are an artist and i am a fake
you are an artist and i am a fake
you are an artist and i am a fake
Track Name: detroit
detroit is such a sad fucking city
and i will probably live there someday
as a tribute to my family
who have grown tired of the taste of my name

i will grow up on the setting sun
i will grow up on the setting sun
i will grow up on the setting sun
i will grow up on the setting sun

detroit is such a sad fucking city
and i will probably die there someday
as a tribute to my family
who are the only ones that can see my grave
Track Name: ok ok ok ok
i hate when you say “you're perfect”
that's bullshit
i'm okay, i'm okay
don't you notice? you know this
you buy me a pink carnation
tell me that i'm as pretty as nature
but i've seen the morning sun rise
i'm the emptiness you feel at night
i see through your lines like the windows
i sat in back of class staring out of
can't you see? i'm made of flaws
like permanent marker i can't get off

i'm okay, i'm okay
don't tell me, i'm everything
i'm okay, i'm okay
don't tell me, i'm everything
Track Name: read receipts
i told you all of my secrets as i bled to life
you told me you were often lonely inside
you said that we could be like an 80s movie
and i’m so stupid that i believed

you remind me of a boy i used to know
i thought you might be different
you remind me why i hate myself
i thought you might be different

i told you all of secrets as i bled to life
i asked you to hang out with me tonight
you didn’t respond and i deleted the text
because i don’t want to know when you read it
Track Name: i can count
you are, you are the one
you are, you are the one
you are, you are the one
i'm just, i'm just someone

you don't care about, and i'm not mad
you don't care about me when i'm sad
you don't care that i have a stupid laugh
you don't care that i left and won't come back

you are, you are the one
you are, you are the one
you are, you are the one
i'm just, i'm just someone

color tv vcr, i'm trying to be something you want
color tv vcr, we're fighting again in the restaurant
color tv vcr, hidden somewhere in my attic
color tv vcr, doesn't work for shit

you are, you are, one, you are the one
you are, you are, two, you are the one
you are, you are, three, you are the one
i am, i am, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, someone

you are, you are the one
Track Name: wanna go to hell together
kill me like they killed our boy jesus, back then
i’ll play the child and you’ll play the romans

i’m so sorry but i can’t save the world from our sins
a cross my hands are tied and i’m a shitty person

kill me like they killed our boy jesus, back then
twelve apostles and no best friends

listen to my lies and convince everyone to believe them
tell my father that i’m sorry i disappointed him

kill me like they killed our boy jesus, back then
i wanna be dead, i wanna be dead again

kill me like they killed our boy jesus, back then
i wanna be dead, i wanna be dead, dead again
Track Name: january 5th breakdown
it's january 5th and it's snowing right now

you told me it was snowing
and i said i didn't care
and i stayed under my covers
and acted like i wasn't scared

i told you i was crying
and you said you didn't care
i stayed inside of my own head
and i pretended like i was better

i lost of my pain killers
that had grown to rely on
because i knew had them for whenever to die
now i don't know what to do

i lost faith in myself
i lost everything i bought
i lost my own thoughts that had to tell me that i was
better than these feelings

you told me it was snowing
and i said who gives a fuck
and i stayed my covers
and i'll never feel like enough