1. |
Nonsense Highway
01:57
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out on the freeway driving
hiding til the good day dawns
gone when i close my eyelids
i land on another island
i couldn’t tell you what
the world wasn’t meant for the two of us
you ask me where i’m at
and i say i’ve been getting mad
the cows can’t come home
if they only learned to roam
all bent out of my shape
a state of simpler conversation
done with the city life
i’d like to be a country wife
why do the birds fly west
they’re just like us they’ll wind up dead
where do you want to go
i’d go with you to say hello
the man who paints the roads
knows no one ever thinks of him
i couldn’t tell you what
the world wasn’t meant for the two us
you ask me where i’m at
and i say i’ve been getting mad
i’ve been getting up to
i’ve been getting up to
i’ve been getting up too late
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2. |
Dear Rachel
02:20
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just another day on the verge
just another day on the verge
submerge my heart i don’t want it now
today i was sitting at the pier waiting for the exact time of a reservation
i remember everything but not the images only the residuals
everything is okay and the passage of time is less of a slice out of my flesh than before
i feel so connected to my life but it wasn't me, i wasn't there, i wasn't conscious
there is this deeply pained version of myself waiting for any open opportunity to hop over the rails and into terminal danger
i always want to run
i do not know towards what but i know it's away from myself
i wasted so many nights thinking "this one might be the one"
every night passed and none of them were the hopes i had placed on them
the last two weeks of my life were like entering and exiting the rabbit hole
of course i feel lost, there's nothing else i've ever been
tell me am i fucking up in the right way?
i don’t think anyone can feel my gaze
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3. |
Hard Drive
02:18
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burnt out i can’t even light a cigarette now
cuz i’m scared i’ll lose my voice
though i don’t even like to use it
it’s just getting too expensive
i’m too cheap to double check my pulse
growing up looks like fiction
a depiction of an image
pixelated to perfection
i’m not real i’m a silhouette i bet
a specter no one ever writes me letters
in the pocket of my coat
you wrote me out of another chapter
how’s it living in the after?
i miss the certainty of life
godspeed the sleepless nights
i’m a storage device
i’m a storage device
so do you believe in saving
or in magnets and their laws
so do you believe in saving
i’m an obstruction to the cause
i’m a storage device
i’m a storage device
i’m a storage device
i’m a storage device
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4. |
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is it raining?
or am i crying?
do you miss me?
or are you lying?
every every every every every single time i
the plane takes off
and i go home
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5. |
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i have to find my calling card
i don’t why i don’t respond
i saw you on the edge of next year
you looked like you didn’t want me here
you don’t even breathe, you’re breathless
you don’t even breathe, you’re breathless
stay strange to me, i’m lonely i’m lonely
stay strange to me, i’m lonely i’m lonely
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6. |
Singular
03:43
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going 90 down the freeway
and i don't think i could ever be your friend
they're everything that you've never been
just another morning all wrapped up in someone else when all i really wanted was to find me in myself
there i am oh there i was just another body just another story that i never want to tell
so tell me it's been 3 weeks just so i know you know
and i'll say i've been busy and i'm sorry i have to let you go
going 90 down the freeway
the earth alone just makes me wanna cry
yeah she's the only place i'd ever die
just another weekend all wrapped up in someone else when all i really wanted was to find me in myself
so i manufacture something to serve my basic needs, a reminder that all i’ll ever be is unfamiliar cells
so tell me it's been two years just so i know you know
and i'll say i've been busy and i'm sorry i had to let you go
going 90 down the freeway
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7. |
Pushing The Limit
02:13
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read me like a subtitle
let’s see how far this thing can go
i’m standing still like the pacific
it’s all downhill until i pivot
give it more than just a day
spent thirty six hours awake
standing up like i was joking
coping, coughing, smoking
i don’t think i’ve been this broken
cracked wide open
and what do you know
i’m hollow
there’s always bigger pills to swallow
they’re following me
i can’t see what they see
i can only plead with my body
i’m nobody how come nobody
confesses the abstract of my being
the fact that i can’t stop from leaving
or coming back to where i was
because i love the shape of circles
because i love the weight of the world
because i love the way that you were
someone else
and not myself
and not myself
i’m not myself
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8. |
Destroy Me
01:58
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when does addiction start
it’s still raining in your car
took a pill took it to heart
yeah it’s lonelier where you are
won’t you give me space
won’t you make space for me
won’t you give me space
won’t you make space for me
won’t you give me space
won’t you make space for me
won’t you take my place
break through and destroy me
i don’t wanna i don’t wanna i don’t wanna sweat
i don’t wanna i don’t wanna i don’t wanna sweat
i don’t wanna i don’t wanna i don’t wanna sweat
i don’t wanna i don’t wanna work myself to death
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9. |
My Name
03:07
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call me when you're frustrated
instead of my name
date me just for july
one whole year of pouring rain
i can't stand to lose it
use me baby or i'm useless
i'm so tired of feeling stupid
teach me something i'm so clueless
i want to love until i’m cut in half
do you want me back? you wanted me when you were feeling sad
i want to love until i’m cut in half
do you hate me now? you wanted me when you were feeling down
call me when you’re hung up
i can’t help but i can hurt
miss me when it’s august
but you promised someone else
i can’t stand to lose it
use me baby or i'm useless
just another loser
use me baby you’re a user
i want to love until i’m cut in half
do you want me back? you wanted me when you were feeling sad
i want to love until i’m cut in half
do you hate me now? you wanted me when you were feeling down
i can't stand to lose it
use me baby or i'm useless
i can't stand to lose it
use me baby or i'm useless
i want to love until i’m cut in half
do you want me back? you wanted me when you were feeling sad
i want to love until i’m cut in half
do you hate me now? you wanted me when you were feeling down
i want to love until i’m cut in half
do you want me back? you wanted me when you were feeling sad
i want to love until i’m cut in half
do you hate me now? you wanted me when you were feeling down
i can't stand to lose it
use me baby or i'm useless
i can't stand to lose it
use me baby or i'm useless
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10. |
Delusions Of Grandeur
02:13
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i know that everybody loves you
i know that everybody loves you
they all want a piece of your flesh
to watch your lungs control your breath
to pull your teeth and kiss your lips
how can you live when it’s like this
i know that everybody loves you
i know that everybody loves to
drink the poison from your liver
blow cold air to make you shiver
hold your hands until they’re dust
how can you live this isn’t love
do you want them to consume you to turn you into
something they can disassemble
i just want to know you tremble
i just want your eyes in focus
i just want you to notice
no i don’t want a goddamn thing
what would you want if you were me
do you want them to consume you to turn you into
something they can disassemble
i just want to know you tremble
i just want to know you tremble
i just want to know you tremble
i just want to know you
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11. |
In My Pockets
02:55
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i left the party early
i didn’t even go home
my keys were in my pockets
all i did was run
the streets were undefeated
another winning season
my keys were in my pockets
a new day had begun
the air outside was humid
i wondered how to breathe
my keys were in my pockets
the past was almost done
i thought about calling
but couldn’t find the number
my keys were in my pockets
how do you know someone
i left the party early
i didn’t even go home
my keys were in my pockets
all i did was run
i went to your apartment
you didn’t even live there
my keys were in my pockets
i noticed the world spun
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12. |
Torch Song
03:55
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saw you in the bigger picture thought by now we’d have it figured out go figure i know less than i did last year i know less than when i got here cigarettes were 7.50 at the deli i was eighteen handing over my fake id
i went walking past the past used to scare me there’s me all those years ago i go back to where i went the time that i spent the people that i used to know i’m a stranger in a stranger city that much hasn’t changed it’s busy what a pity it’s all for the sold out show
you just want to stay out late to prove you’re right every night has its day
and tonight is the night you say
funny to think the things that rolled off my tongue and onto the concrete yeah nothing was concrete but nothing was so sweet as a chance to fuck up a dance in the dark getting too drunk falling in love with someone so lost already a loss i take a tally and add up the cost i’m in debt to the world no i’m not your girl
i just want to stay the same to prove i’m wrong there’s nothing left to dwell on
if you always knew it wasn’t a torch song
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thanks for coming Brooklyn, New York
thanks! (they/them)
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