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before back then

by thanks for coming

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1.
losing touch 02:47
it’s so goddamn easy to lose touch i’ve been around but i haven’t been around that much do you think i’m losing it do you think about me at all if you call i’d answer but you never call and i don’t answer too busy thinking about natural disasters and i don’t answer too busy watching everything shatter i miss talking to you or anybody honestly i take the train just to watch strangers be lonely do you think i’m losing it do you think about me at all if you wanted to and i wanted to we could talk but i don’t answer too busy thinking about crumbling plaster and i don’t answer too busy watching time turn faster and i don’t answer too busy waiting for everyone to scatter and i don’t answer too busy looking for what comes after it’s so goddamn easy to lose touch sorry i haven’t been around it’s always just too much
2.
You told me not to interrupt your listening sequence But I wasn't aware I could interrupt with silence I told you I wanted to mean something to you someday Did you ever write that poem about me? It’s fine if you didn’t When you asked me, I was thinking about yo I was thinking about how I’d rather not wake up tomorrow And how it’s been days since the sky has been blue I was being honest, I realize now that you were too When I asked you, you were thinking about me Ways to stop being restless. Ways to stop being lonely. Where my hair falls on my shoulders. Do we kiss in the movie? You were being honest, and then I stopped talking You were in a rough place, I was in the same space It was poor timing, we should’ve bought matching watches You were in a rough place, we could never talk face to face It was poor timing, did we miss it or was it always a mistake
3.
i know you’re better off i wish i was better back then i can’t stand nostalgia it makes me wish things were different i lose everything in autumn always have and always will i’m sad about the things i miss out on and smoke cigarettes on my windowsill i know that this is pathetic i haven’t changed at all i hope that you just forget it i was young and you were a close call and if i asked you how you are would you tell me you’re okay and if i asked you anything at all would you reply or leave me hanging and if i asked you how you are would you tell me you are fine and if i asked you anything at all would you ask me why i didn’t try this is the saddest song for when i was seventeen and stupid everything i do is still wrong it’s too bad things didn’t turn out different

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released November 9, 2016

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thanks for coming Brooklyn, New York

thanks! (they/them)

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